A Girl And Me

There was a girl who thought I was too weird to be a friend of her’s. She was a very talented girl in art class. I did grow jealous of the talent she had, sure I wished I had the same talent as she had but that was not the case of what happened between me and her. She and I for a few years hated each other. Yes I was a bully towards her and she was a bully towards me. There were some times when I thought he had reconciled and were going to be friends but sadly old habits got the better of me and I continued to annoy her. She and I just did not like each other.

At one point in life she did mimic me when she was hanging out with a friend of her’s who happened to be an ok friend of mine. Oh I remember getting very mad at her for doing that. I wanted to punch her in the face. But of course you know that would have turned me into a monster. So I yelled at her instead. That is what got her and I both to the office, she and I had to talk it over and try and become good classmates. But that did not do anything to change our hate. Just when you would think everything was going to be ok, everything took a turn for the bad again. She and I were still rude to each other. But most of all it was me being rude to her. My aunt thought it was because I thought she was cute or something like that. I did’t think I liked her at first. Well ok I did have a crush on her at the very beginning so I guess you can say my aunt was right about that. I don’t think the girl would have understood. Truthfully I think that she is better off not knowing. She was beautiful but she and I were both at each other’s throats.

Grade 11 was the year that I kept on getting mad. I guess you can say it was because I was expecting too much for myself. She and I were still at each other’s throats. I guess it was all revenge because she didn’t want to be my friend. How bad does that sound? Very childish I would like to say. Our anger towards each other reached a bad climax when she almost blocked me as I left the school parking lot. She, her younger sister and a friend of her’s tried to tease me as they almost blocked me. I felt threatened so I picked up a rock and told them to stay away from me. They accepted that but I needed to get my anger out. So I threw the rock and it hit the roof. It was a small rock just so you all know. That was the worst weekend of my life. I began to wonder whether life was worth it or not. Of course I chose to live and learn form that awful mistake I did. I came home, told my parents everything that happened. But that was not all that I did. One spring morning I was not taking criticism the right way and I was so enraged I ran up to her and kissed her at the back of the head. I know it sounds like I did a nice thing but I didn’t. I did a very bad thing. My mother said in some ways what I did was assault or some kind of assault. Yes I did get into bigger trouble and I regretted all bad things I did from the moment I was called down to the office. I am not a bad man, I was just a young man dealing with personal struggles I just took things the wrong way. Some days I can still take things the wrong way. 

I always think back to what the horrible choices and how I wish I could take it all back. I still get mad at myself for the things I did. Most of all I wish that I could go back in time and make everything better again. If only I had that one wish I would go to the art class where we met and be nice to her. Plus accept that she didn’t want to be a friend. I should have been nice to her from the very beginning

It was not until grade 12 when she and I started to talk to each other. All of a sudden we became good class mates. She even started to in some ways worry about me. She thought I was in trouble after all. She did kind of worry about a chip on my tooth. She thought that It was done by me on intentionally. Well that is not the case I told her. I told her that when I was young kid I used to grind my teeth when I slept. One morning I woke up with a chip in my tooth. She told me that I need to be good to myself. I think she and I got along at the end because she saw me hanging out with her younger sister. Probably it was there how she got to see what an entertaining guy I was or still am. Now that we have both graduated we are moving on with our lives.  At our graduation party I walked up to her and asked her “What was it that made us talk to each other?” She said “I don’t know.” I personally think it was because we both grew up and learned that we are going to be who we are going to be. It has now been 2 years and we have not seen each other since. I did know that she worked at a restaurant but she left to go to school. For the last year I hung out with her sister now and then even gave her a graduation card to her and a friend. We had great times hanging out with each other. Now I have not seen both her and sister since. So I moved on with my life. Just like they did. I do miss her at times.

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